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WESLACO — Ron Swanson once said, “There has never been a sadness that can’t be cured by breakfast food.”
This “Parks and Rec” quote carried me out the door as I ventured to get breakfast without my woman, who was too sleepy to go with me. I think she growled at me as I kissed her goodbye.
Despite the absence of my partner in crime, I was happy to be joined by my dad who has his own Swanson-esque mustache and a particular fondness of breakfast food.
We decided to meet at Jose’s Cafecito Restaurant, which is located inside the historic Villa De Cortez in downtown Weslaco. They serve breakfast throughout their entire hours of operation, and they seem to pride themselves in their freshly brewed coffee.
My dad is a veteran of the Navy who I once described as the “meanest, toughest, sharpest man I’ve ever known.” He likes his coffee black and strong, and will drink it all day and all night. I am a veteran of high school band. I like my coffee with a dash of Sweet’n Low, and can only have a few cups before my tummy starts to feel funny.
Anyway, Jose’s Cafecito seemed like the perfect spot for me to spend time with my dad and listen to him talk about how much he hates decaf.
As we sipped our coffee, which was delicious, I was immediately drawn to an item on the menu called Truck Driver’s Special. This dish comes with three eggs, three sausage patties, three strips of bacon, three slices of toast and hash browns. The dish seemed appetizing, and the name made me think of Country Roland, but there was another dish that I couldn’t pass up.
I decided to order the Fireman’s Special. This meal includes two biscuits smothered in sausage gravy and topped with hash browns, bacon and two eggs. I ordered my eggs scrambled with cheese. The waitress asked me if I wanted the half-order (she must’ve seen the pink, empty Sweet’n Low packets by my coffee mug), but I scoffed and confirmed that I wanted the whole thing.
My dad ordered Xavier Migas. These are not your regular fried corn tortillas with eggs. Xavier Migas are mixed with chorizo and bacon with melted mozzarella cheese on top. It is served with a side of refried beans and flour tortillas. The waitress did not ask my dad if he wanted the half-order.
Needless to say, I definitely should’ve taken our waitress’s advice. The Fireman’s Special is an enormous mountain of deliciousness layered on the delicate plate. It weighed about as much as a large bible, which I could’ve used because I needed Jesus to help me finish this meal.
The biscuits were huge, which only made me miss my girlfriend even more (she loves biscuits). Each bite was coated in the peppery gravy with bits of sausage and bacon mixed in. It was hearty and savory, yet comforting and so filling. I wanted to finish the meal, but I was full.
I now understand what Adam Richman meant when he described the food wall on “Man v. Food.” I could not eat another bite, though I really wanted to. I am clearly not cut out to be a fireman, and will probably need the jaws of life to get my pants off later.
My dad cleaned his plate and ordered a black coffee to go.
Jose’s Cafecito Restaurant is located at 260 S. Texas Blvd., Suite 107. Hours are 7 a.m. to 3 p.m. daily.
